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Old 09-13-2014, 12:54 AM
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Default choices

The decisions are difficult. I don't believe in abortion normally.
But having had a baby with severe brain abnormalities and realizing what it means to care for a disabled child, I feel now that I might have terminated the pregnancy had I known earlier that he would be born disabled.
We found out too late to abort, despite all of our early testing (including CVS) being normal.

My son is suffering a lot now. He was in the NICU 2 months after birth. I watched them do tons of painful testing on him for months. He can't eat or digest food properly. His muscle ton is terrible so he gets frustrated at his physical limitations at just 3 months old. He cries all the time.

I almost died during childbirth from a placental abruption after having polyhydramnios.
He caught viral meningitis after being discharged from NICU from my 2-year-old.
Turned blue in the back of our SUV and almost died.
I had to give him CPR and revive him waiting for the ambulance. This is not something I would wish on my worst enemy.
I thought he would die in my arms and I would feel bad the rest of my life about it.
He survived it, but he is extremely clingy to me due to having been in and out of the hospital and probably missing us while he was in the hospital (I can't bear to visit and watch all the painful procedures they do to him there).
It is a hard decision, regardless. One has to be very strong to deal with the choice they make, either way they go with it.
Good luck to you.
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